Ciggy arrived with what appeared to be a relatively good 2.25 diesel engine but it was only a 3 main bearing (MB) which, apparently, wasn’t ideal. That said it was a good little engine and started very quickly, even on cold damp mornings after a week or so of no action but it was lacking a little bit of umph (is that torque in car engine speak?) And so the great engine debate began.
What we really needed, Mud informed me, whilst I was recovering from the shock of reading the Visa card bill which, coincidently, had arrived at the same time as the rather sick looking bank statement, was a 200TDi but that, he reluctantly informed me, was well out of our budget (what budget?) and so we’d have to settle for the much cheaper 5MB 2.25 diesel option.
He managed to track one down, quite close to where we live but, unfortunately, after one abortive trip to collect the engine, he reluctantly decided that, due to time constraints, the only option was to strip and rebuild Ciggys’ existing engine.
The bank manager, the Visa card and I all breathed a huge sigh of relief when Mud declared that the engine was in pretty good condition, with little or no wear on the cylinders and that, with a minimum spend, it could be restored to good working order.
It’s a curious thing but I’ve noticed with Land Rovers that for every high experienced during the rebuild process, there is the inevitable fall, on a par with the opening scenes from ‘Cliff Hanger’, back into deepest, darkest depression, as yet another botch job is uncovered and, in Muds’ case, it was the engine.
You see, our 2.25 diesel wasn’t a 2.25 diesel at all, it was, in fact, a 2.125 diesel!
Now before you all rush to look up the history of the Series Land Rovers and inform me that no such engine exists, let me clear up any confusion arising from my earth shattering announcement. What we actually have, Mud thinks, is a 2.25 diesel block which is married, albeit not very happily, to a 2ltr diesel head.
“The engine is scrap,” was Muds’ dramatic conclusion, quickly followed by “We’ll have to buy another engine!”
Now I’m not an engineer and anything technical generally flummoxes me quite easily but it seemed to me that the easiest, cheapest solution to the problem was to locate and buy a 2.25 diesel head, to marry to the existing block. Surely! Simple! Yes?
Apparently not. What, Mud argued, was the point of spending money on a replacement head for a mere 3MB engine when, for just a little more cash he could get a complete 5MB engine. So off he went to ring the company that had the engine we had tried to collect a couple of weeks earlier, to see if it was sill available.
It was but to Muds joy, they also had a complete 200TDi as well – for more than double the price of the 5M!!
I have also noticed, over recent months, that Mud can find a good and valid reason for anything when he really wants to. Here’s an example for you:
- The monthly Tesco bill is always excessive, in Muds’ lexicon, and we can’t possibly need as much as that! What’s wrong with beans on toast every meal? And is it really necessary to buy soap, washing powder and hair colourant (colours up to 100% grey and, living with a Landy enthusiast, I definitely need all the help I can get);
- On the other hand, buying a 200 TDi (for 2.5 times the cost of the 5MB diesel) is an economical purchase in the long run, according to Mud. Let’s not worry about the fact that some adjustments will need to be made to accommodate the engine within Ciggy, during construction (these adjustments will be free will they?)
Well the 200TDi is currently sitting in the workshop partly stripped and now Mud’s been told that there is a possibility that he may be able to get his hands on a 300TDi!!
Oh joy! Just what we need! Another engine to go with the ones we already have. Mind you I shouldn’t really be surprised after all we already have: 2 pairs of wings; 3 different roof options; 2 bonnets; only 1 tub but 2 different back options (tailgate or back door); and more wheel and tyre choices than Kwikfit and National Tyres put together.
I’ve seen watches with interchangeable dial surrounds and interchangeable cases for mobile phones but never have I seen interchangeable cars before now.
All Mud needs to do is spray an ‘entire’ cars worth of body parts in one of two different colours (we may well have to invest in a second tub though, oh and may be some doors) and then we will have a truly interchangeable car. We could park the little grey Truck Cab in the workshop on Friday evening and drive a G4 orange hardtop version out on Monday morning, complete with different spec engine. That truly is a bargain – 2 for the price of one!
The Land Rover Owners Ex Wife 