The Land Rover Owners Ex Wife

……becoming me again

Jumper in King Cole Moods DK: the front … and some giant piranah!

1 Comment

I really like the colour and speckle of the yarn

I really like the colour and speckle of the yarn

With the girls safely tucked up in bed and the dishes finished, I sat down, picked up my knitting and got to work finishing off the front section of my jumper. I only had a few more rows to complete before I needed to make the turn for the neck section and I wanted to make a start on the back rib. Beside me, Mud had been browsing through his forums, blog and Ebay pages but when the program I had been watching/listening to finished on the television, he picked up the remote and flicked the guide pages on.

“Oh, there’s a horror on,” he said.

I paused long enough to give him a sharp sideways glance and reminded him that I really didn’t like horror movies, too which he replied that he’d only seen this particular film a few months ago, so didn’t want to watch it anyway and he resumed his trawl through the guide to see what alternatives there were, muttering about the lack of decent programmes considering the number of channels that were available these days.

I continued with my knitting.

Raglan edge: my preferred type of sleeve

Raglan edge: my preferred type of sleeve

“Oh! I don’t think I’ve seen that one,” was uttered a few seconds later and I glanced up only to catch a fleeting glimpse of the program information page he’d been reading, as he flicked onto a particular channel. Actually it was the words “violent horror” that I caught sight of, just as the screen changed from guide to TV! Great! Just what I wanted to watch on a Friday evening. Cheers hun!

I decided to quickly finish the row I was working on and go have a long, soak in the bath, thereby avoiding a large chunk of the film, before grabbing my needles and finishing the front off upstairs with a gentler, more conducive program for company on the portable TV. However, by the time I had finished my row, several things had become blatantly obvious:

The acting was atrocious, the dialogue was beyond atrocious, the plot was a crime in its’ own right, the music was heavily reminiscent of  a 1970s budget production and as for the CGI and special effects ….. oh my, all I can say is that the image of a ginormous piranha, flying through the air, into the second story window/wall of a building where it exploded on impact, will probably live on in my memory far longer than it really should and for all the wrong reasons.

“Abandon ship” dramatically delivered by the captain of a destroyer sent to blow up the mutant fish, was ingenious and side splittingly funny, uttered as it was at a time when the voracious monsters were in the process of devouring the ship and all who were on board her. In between holding my aching sides and wiping my eyes, my first thought was where too? Far from the nightmare inducing horror film Mud infrequently tries to subject me to, this movie was hysterically funny but so dire that we switched off just after the pack of mutant fish gobbled up the Nuclear submarine which had deployed its’ arsenal of missiles, destroying the eco system for generations to come but having not a jot of impact on the piranha themselves.

The cable panel was quite intricate but worth it.

The cable panel was quite intricate but worth it.

Of course the film is referred to as a ‘mockbuster’ on a certain film website but even that is too kind for the terrifyingly poor standard of film that we watched for an hour, with Mud making frequent references to its’ direness and to the fact that we should switch it off. Well he had the remote, not me!

On a positive note, I not only managed to get my front piece finished but I also cast on and started the 2×2 rib for the back section. The finished section looks pretty good and I do like the cable pattern panel. This jumper is blessed with Raglan sleeves which are my preferred choice of sleeves as the decreases on the front and back sections, exactly match those on the sleeves which makes the whole process of setting the sleeves so much easier, in my opinion. The back section is wholly stocking stitch but shouldn’t take too long to complete and then I’ll be onto the sleeves which are patterned all the way up and across, all off which I hope to complete without the help or hindrance of any more horror films please!



One thought on “Jumper in King Cole Moods DK: the front … and some giant piranah!

  1. It’s looking good! Love the yarn. The TV is one of those things we have issues with too! The thing that drives me mad is him coming in, switching it on and then not watching it. We often have words as I quite like it off!

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