The Land Rover Owners Ex Wife

……becoming me again

No snow for Mud

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I have been a Land Rover owners wife for a little over 3 years now and yet certain aspects of the behaviour and mind set of these (shall we say, unique?) individuals and in particular those like Mud who own Series Landys, still bemuse me and afford me amusement and frustration in equal measure.

There is the ‘love/hate’ relationship they have with their beloved vehicles which depends wholly on:

  • whether or not it is currently on the road, in which case it’ll be the best vehicle ever, so easy to maintain, never lets us down: or,
  • if there is work that does needs doing, how difficult it is to undo and remove any parts that may need attention, how many different sizes of nut and bolt has previously been used on the affected area, whether or not they have or can actually get spare parts, nuts and bolts and how much pain and injury the Landy has managed to inflict upon them this time.

Landy owners also have a strange way at looking at rounding up and rounding down, or at least Mud does. Take for example the bill for the monthly shop! THAT always gets rounded up to the nearest £50, so  a £206 shop, for sake of argument is, apparently £250!!! However, Mud will be keen to point out that £200 for the latest batch of parts for Annie or Ciggy was a bargain when in fact the invoice/receipt will, for example, show £237 + delivery and VAT.

This last few weeks though, has proven ever so frustrating for dear old Mud and has highlighted a huge difference between him (and I’m guessing most die hard Series owners) and the rest of the country, and most certainly fellow villagers. He has had to watch as others have had several inches of snow to deal with and somehow, we have missed it, with one notable exception when 3 – 4 inches appeared overnight a week or so ago and he was able to go out in Annie and have a bit of fun in some deepish snow up on the tops. However, that particular batch of snow was gone 24 hours later.

So it was with the excitement of a child that he followed reports of a large snowfall predicted for our area today. Even as late as last night, the forecasters were promising (or threatening depending on your point of view) several inches of the white stuff in our area. Alas, Mud ripped open the curtains this morning to find …… nothing! Zip! Not even a frost on the ground. I can not tell you how disappointed he was but never mind, maybe it was due to hit later on today. So he fired up the computer and visited the Met Office web site only to discover that although snow was falling on 3 out of 4 sides of where we are, it actually wasn’t forecast to snow in our patch anymore.

Oh dear! I did chuckle to myself though, and he glared at me but had to give a begrudging grin as I pointed out that he was probably the only person in the whole village not giving a huge sigh of relief this morning, and that didn’t he think it was funny that while everyone else had been worrying about the ‘threat‘ of snow he had been as happy as a pig in muck at the ‘promise‘ of snow. Different perception of the same thing and, certainly in our neck of the woods, uniquely Land Rover ownerish!

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